Resettled Refugee Families: Parenting Practices and Educational Involvement ()
1. Introduction
According to the United Nations High Commissioner for Refugee (UNHCR, 2020), a staggering 82.4 million people worldwide were forcibly displaced in 2020. This is equivalent to an average of one person being displaced every two seconds, and such mass movement by force has been referred to as the global crisis with the highest number of humanitarian needs since World War II (Deen, 2018). Among those forcibly displaced, 20.7 million are defined as refugees. From 2010 to 2021, over 600,000 refugees from various continents (e.g., Africa, Asia, Europe, Latin America, and the Caribbean) were resettled in the United States, with over 100,000 expected in 2022 (Blinken, 2021; Refugee Processing Center, 2022). With the rapidly rising refugee population in the United States, supporting resettled refugee families is a pressing issue, in which a comprehensive understanding of the refugee families is sorely needed. A refugee is a person who has been forced to leave his or her country because of war, prosecution, or violence (UNHCR, 2020). As Grandi, the United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees, pointed out: “Now, more than ever, taking care of refugees must be a global and shared responsibility. It’s time to do things differently” (UNHCR, 2020).
Refugees are forced to leave their country with horrendous experiences. After relocation, however, refugees encounter the additional set of challenges that accompany adaptation to a new environment (Wachter et al., 2016). Moreover, refugees lose the social support system of their home country, such as extended family support (Bellinger, 2013). These families face many barriers to integration into the immediate community: low socioeconomic status, limited resources, limited language skills, discrimination, lack of knowledge of community services, and so on (Ahn et al., 2014; Deen, 2018; Stewart et al., 2015). According to Bhatia (2002), individuals from distinctly different cultures and beliefs are “assimilated, separated, and marginalized” due to their “diasporic” disparities (p. 57). This phenomenon holds huge bearing on refugee parents, as raising children is one of the major and long-term challenges for refugees. Considering these record-breaking numbers of resettlement over the past 10 years, there is a need for research on educating children with refugee backgrounds (Graham et al., 2016; Koehler & Schneider, 2019; Ramsay & Baker, 2019). The purpose of this paper was to identify the challenges of resettled refugee families in their parenting practices and educational involvement. Specifically, we provided an overview of the parenting challenges and explored the cultural dissonance in parenting and its impact on family dynamics. Then we illustrated the school practices in America and how they contradict to parenting practices of refugee families. This section is ended by describing how parental involvement in their children’s education and schooling. In the second half of the paper, we provided a series of implications to address the challenges refugee families face in the areas of systemic and personnel support, effective strategies, and family-school relations.
1.1. Parenting Experience: A Disequilibrium between Resettled Dominant and Home Cultures
One of the biggest obstacles for refugee parents is raising their children in a new and unfamiliar culture. Tummala-Narra (2004) indicates that managing the influence imposed by the dominant culture adds an additional burden to the host of obstacles that new immigrants face when relocating their family. The distress is exhibited through cultural displacement of immigrant parents who challenge their cultural identity and daily practices. It can be extremely challenging for these families to navigate an unfamiliar environment without knowledge of available support, resources, and services. Specifically, refugee parents struggle to seek the appropriate channels to provide basic needs for their children, such as housing, utilities, banking, transportation, and food (Deen, 2018). For example, refugees from Africa are used to communal parenting. The community invests in families, contributes to children’s upbringing, and is part of children’s life. As soon as the children are born, they belong to the community (Ranard, 2014). The community could be extended families, neighbors, friends, etc. Children learn values not only from their parents, but from other adults as well. Because trust exists in the community, communal parenting is a successful approach in Africa. For example, the majority of children raised in communities in which multiple adults are viewed as equal parental units have a higher-than-average degree of maturity, self-confidence, openness, and independence (Johnston & Robert, 1973). However, Lewig et al. (2010) point out that there exists a major discrepancy between close living in the United States and the communal parenting environments of some refugees from Africa. Independent parenting is foreign to these refugee families. Conceptualizing parenting as an individualistic, not collective, vocation, can be stressful and overwhelming for these families. Stresses can arise from a variety of factors, including the lack of a community support system on parenting, economic burden of childcare, role conflict from misaligned schedules of childcare and families’ working hours, etc.
Within the refugees’ family units, parents experience acculturation challenges. Acculturation is often referred to as the process of changes in the person’s original home cultural pattern by continuous contact with a group of people from a different culture (Berry, 1997). Children are raised under an umbrella of their parents’ culture, which encompasses the elements of language, beliefs, and values. Therefore, it is logical to conclude that dissonance between the child-rearing styles of refugee parents and that of their host country can generate internal conflict within family units. Perhaps the biggest strain is the growing gap between refugee parents and their children, who acculturate much more quickly. Parenting is bidirectional. It is an interactive and constantly changing process relevant to the behaviors of parents and their children (Deen, 2018; Hoghughi & Long, 2004; Ochocka & Janzen, 2008). As such, children’s behaviors impact their parents’ child-rearing processes. Thus, any changes that influence family dynamics can add more tensions and stresses to the family as well as have an impact on the child’s behaviors (Kershaw et al., 2014).
Children generally acculturate faster than their parents because they learn the new language more rapidly and are more frequently engaged in the community (Renzaho & Vignjevic, 2011). For instance, a Somali refugee parent may speak mostly Somali and limited English while the child speaks English with limited Somali. Incongruent communication skills can impact the parent-child dynamic in a problematic manner (Garrett, 2006). In fact, low language proficiency can reduce the confidence of refugee parents in child-rearing (Awad et al., 2013; Deen, 2018). Moreover, family roles can change significantly to the point of role reversal. Due to greater English proficiency, a child may take on a new role as the family representative by interacting with the outside community through interpretation assistance. This can lead to power shift. As refugee children take on increasing responsibility, parents may feel dependent and less confident in dealing with the outside community. The parent-child dynamic is thus disturbed, and children, especially teens, may use this to their advantage in the family dynamic.
Still, maintaining traditional family values is critical for refugee parents to reconnect with their cultural roots and child-rearing practices. As point out by Ochocka & Janzen (2008), the parenting process is influenced by parental values, beliefs, and ideas on how to raise children. Bergnehr (2016) states that parenting connects not only to the future but also to past experiences. Preserving values from refugee parents’ past experiences, while leaving room for some flexibility as they encounter in the present context, is a strategy to provide stability and continuity to the family (Tingvold et al., 2012). However, children, especially adolescents, may have more trouble maintaining the original cultural values. Their faster acculturation into the new cultural norm, while parents continue to perceive parenting as they did in their home country, can lead to family incoherence and conflict (Miranda et al., 2000).
The following example focuses on the values of respect and freedom. In Garrett’s (2006) study, a parent commented, “Children are Americanized and not respectful of their parents.” Respect connotes different meaning to different cultures. To this parent, respect implies obedience in her home culture; on the contrary, in American culture, respect associates with admiration and esteem. In another study, some parents indicated that children have too much freedom in the United States (Deen, 2018). They indicated that children have greater autonomy and the right to act and speak in the United States than their home culture. The value differences among parents and children impact the power distribution in the family, the parent-child relationship, and parenting practices. This concept, also highlighted by Yagmurlu & Sanson (2009), is referred to as the acculturation disparities between the host and home culture led to incongruent parenting styles.
In addition, the psychological pull between the dominant and home culture among parents and children was described by participants in Garret’s (2006) study vividly.
“The young want to become American and the old want to keep the tradition.”
“The young are running away from the culture, running away from the parents, because that represents ignorance and it represents embarrassment. So, you see more and more of kids with the tennis shoes, with the hip-hop, and the gangs. We have drug use and teen pregnancy which is not part of my culture.”
This strife between the perspectives of family members creates a division in the behavior of refugee children, who are enforced to practice their heritage at home, but otherwise engage in a lifestyle reflective of the host country’s culture (McBrien, 2005). The implications of this are far-reaching for family dynamics, family roles, preservation of traditions, languages, and culture, and cultural identity.
1.2. School Practices Fostering the Assimilation Process
Schools often are the sites where the culture and traditions of refugees are most challenged, as they are the sites where children begin to adapt to American values and customs that are usually against their parents’ wishes. Refugee parents may be concerned that schools “Americanize” their children and undermine their traditions and religion. A good example is the value of independence in the United States, which can be perceived as selfishness in some refugee families. American schools value independence, and students are encouraged to strive for individuality in learning, relationships, personal goal pursuit, and so on. Conversely, many refugees come from collectivistic cultures in which interconnectedness between people is critical. Some refugee parents perceive independence as selfishness because it focuses on each individual’s needs over the needs of the group (Garrett, 2006). As one puts his or her own needs above group needs, concerned primarily with one’s own interest and building up oneself, it could undermine the group interests at the expense of the group benefits. Thus, pursuing independence is perceived as selfishness to some refugee families as it may lead to sacrifice of the group needs. This is troublesome for refugee families and their parenting practices as individual needs and parent expectations may contradict each other.
1.3. Parental Involvement in Children’s Education and Schooling
Refugee parents value education highly and believe a good education is the key to their children’s success (Dabydeen et al., 2019; Garrett, 2006). It is perceived as the means to a better future for their children, as it promises regained social status (Bergnehr, 2016) and potential upward intergenerational social mobility. Additionally, refugee parents believe that education and schooling impact their children’s well-being (Deen, 2018). However, most refugees have limited education and often intermittent schooling. For example, approximately 36% of the refugees from Democratic Republic of the Congo (DRC) who resettled in the United States have attained intermediate and secondary education (Ranard, 2014). Only one-third of Congolese refugees of 18 years or older reported having some primary schooling experience. Among them, nearly 20% could not read and write, with the majority of the illiterate subset being female (Ranard, 2014).
Inaccessible education in the home country presents a huge obstacle for refugee children and their families in assimilating into the US school system. The lack of knowledge regarding the new educational system adds an additional layer of challenges (Deen, 2018). Based on a national and longitudinal survey, the academic performance of immigrant children, including refugee children, is associated with several factors, including parents’ English language proficiency, parental school involvement, children’s educational aspirations, and children’s language abilities (Jung & Zhang, 2016). These are also the challenges that many refugee families face which lead to obstacles for children’s successful schooling experiences.
Refugee parents also concern many situational factors that may negatively impact their children’s academic performance. Prior to resettlement, refugee children may have been out of school for a considerable time or other inconsistent schooling experiences. Additionally, they may have been exposed to traumatizing horrors of war. Upon relocation, however, refugee children are often placed by their age rather than by their ability at school. Most refugee children fall behind in U.S. schools, particularly those who are unable to speak English (Nunez, 2014; Garrett, 2006). As this language barrier precedes comprehension of academic content, refugee children may be discouraged to learn. If teachers are unaware of these challenges, refugee children can be perceived as lacking interest and motivation to learn. As a result, these adolescents are more likely to drop out of high school and join gangs (Garrett, 2006).
In addition to academic challenges, refugee students, predominantly those at the high school level, tend to have difficulty in building relationships with peers at school. They are hindered by a lack of knowledge of mainstream culture, social norms, and resources. Refugee adolescents must simultaneously face the challenges of resettlement and navigate the journey of adolescence. During this stage of development, they form their identity, trying to determine who they are and what their place is in society. A sense of belonging in a social group is critical. Often, refugee adolescents experience feelings of doubt and anxiety regarding self-concept and belonging in society (Alharbi, 2018).
Parental involvement in children’s learning and schooling is challenging. Several factors impact parents’ level of involvement, such as language proficiency, education level, resources, and time. Due to language barriers, refugee parents can have difficulties in supporting their children’s learning at home, such as an inability to help their children with schoolwork. In addition, most refugee parents have limited education and resources to support their children’s learning. Working long hours or multiple jobs, they may also be physically exhausted by the time they get home. There is a sense of helplessness for these parents even when they value education and are eager to provide support for their children’s academic success. Most of the time, refugee children must independently manage their schoolwork and learning.
In regards to family-school relations, it is difficult for refugee parents to be involved in schools and communicate with the teachers of their children. Many parents are concerned about their children’s schooling challenges, but they feel intimidated by school officials. Due to the unfamiliarity of the US school system, limited education, and lack of English language proficiency, parents are unable to communicate with school faculty to address their concerns and issues. Additionally, there is a lack of school resources that can support refugee families. One instance is the lack of bilingual teachers, interpreters, and counselors who can work with struggling refugee children or communicate with their parents (Garrett, 2006). Oftentimes, children themselves become the translators between their parents and schoolteachers and staff. These practices are inappropriate as the issues discussed concern the children themselves.
Another worry of refugee parents is their children’s experiences of bullying and discrimination from peers and teachers as a result of cultural and ethnic differences (Ahn et al., 2014; Awad et al., 2013) or language proficiency. Garrett (2006)’s study indicated that refugee students from Islamic cultural background are often targets of harassment and teasing. A parent reported, “I wear the hijab in school and some people try and tell me to take it off. I say I can’t take it off…so then they say, ‘so is your father Osama Bin Laden?’” A Somalian refugee adolescent stated that she was ridiculed by her peers often because of her low English proficiency and accents (Garrett, 2006). McBrien (2005) also comments that “adjustment, identity, and language learning are affected by discrimination, cultural dissonance, and the reception that refugees receive from their host society” (p. 344). These factors can contribute to stresses from schooling. Some cases are so severe that refugee children need to drop out of the school due to hostile situations. On the other hand, parents’ worries, concern, and stresses regarding discrimination can impact their wellbeing, parenting practices, and children’s outcome (Awad et al., 2013; Bryant et al., 2018; Koning et al., 2013). Parents tend to project their stresses and worries as anger toward children, which may influence children’s conduct, emotions, and problems with peers (Bryant et al., 2018). Distresses from negative circumstances may cause refugee parents to overreact to their children’s misbehaviors (Conley et al., 2004).
2. Implications
The capability of refugee parents to raise their children plays an influential role in their children’s development and learning. This capacity relates to parents’ personal experiences and challenges. It is important for professionals to understand the experiences and challenges refugee parents face before determining their needs and the support to provide for their pathway toward success (Deen, 2018). Parents’ child-rearing experiences impacts not only their self-concept, self-efficacy, feelings of mastery, and sense of wellbeing, but also their children’s learning and development (Deen, 2018; Tsai et al., 2011).
Many issues that refugee families and children face are interconnected and multi-layered, which makes defining a recommendation challenging. As we deliberate the support needed for this population, it is important to consider the challenges parents and children face and how they are intertwined with one another. Namely, parents and children both encounter language barriers that impact children’s schooling, parent-teacher communication, parental involvement, discrimination, and parent-child relationship. It is important to provide support that can properly address this web of interconnected needs and challenges. We have identified the following notions for considerations.
2.1. Systemic and Personnel Support Implications
At the systemic level, we examined the institutional infrastructure and personnel support. It will be worthwhile to revisit the programs that serve the refugee population with an emphasis on streamlining existing services for refugee families. There are many community-based organizations (e.g., Hebrew Immigrant Aid Society, Lutheran Immigration and Refugee Service) that work with refugee families in addition to government-affiliated and government-funded refugee resettlement programs. However, community services are unconsolidated and thus difficult to navigate, even more so for refugee families who are unfamiliar with the culture and English language. Consider streamlining the process of seeking out community services and strengthening communication across programs of different areas, including schooling, employment, transportation, counseling, and so on. These actions can dissolve the institutional entry barriers that hinder refugees seeking support and resources.
In the restructuring of these service pathways, it is vital to invest in personnel who can serve the role of the refugee advocate, facilitating communication not only between agencies and refugee families but also across agencies. The greater emphasis placed on appropriate staffing investment require funding support. In order to develop an effective system to serve refugee community and prepare refugees for a successful resettlement, we believe that the federal government is the one that has the ability to provide funding for a cohesive system of refugee services. We recommend that the refugee resettlement program recruits a qualified refugee advocate team. It is essential that these qualified advocates are resourceful and able to plead on behalf of the refugee families. An effective team consists of a core within the refugee community and a peripheral advocate outside the refugee community. Collaboratively, the core and peripheral components can work side-by-side to understand the needs of the refugee family and community, identify direct and appropriate avenues for support and services, and pursue these pathways efficiently.
A qualified core advocate is well-respected and resourceful within the refugee community. She/he should be literate in English and have a grasp of American culture as well as a rich cultural knowledge and language proficiency of the refugee community. Within the team structure, this core advocate works directly with the peripheral advocate, a native English speaker who is resourceful and well-connected to the mainstream community. It is essential that the core advocate effectively uses the existing refugee social network to reach out to and support the community. A main piece to the role is that this core advocate works in conjunction with select refugee leaders and reaches out to the community. The peripheral advocate is tasked with understanding the challenges that refugees face, most specifically the obstacles preventing upward mobility, as well as the established resources accessible to refugees. The key to this role is building a support network from existing resources for the refugee community. The advocates act as cultural brokers capable of facilitating exchange between the part of the refugee community they represent and the mainstream American community.
Through this personnel structure, the advocate team is able to access the refugee community in its entirety. Building rapport, identifying needs, and streamlining processes to support and resources can foster the path to resettlement success for refugee families. As such, designated advocates are critical in expediting responses to family needs and bridging the refugee community with the mainstream community.
2.2. Effective Support Strategies and Practices
Most refugee families are highly motivated to thrive (Huang, Lam, & Taylor, 2019). In addition to providing fundamental resources, what they need is external structured support to strengthen their cultural competency, such as English proficiency, cultural knowledge, and navigation skills. If the ultimate goal for refugee families is self-sufficiency, it is important for the advocate team to work with refugees in a long-term engagement. As refugee families start to experience success in daily life, they can gain confidence, which influences their self-efficacy, motivation, and performance. As several refugee leaders have shared, “Don’t give us fish, teach us how to fish.” (Huang et al., 2019). They stated the importance of fostering self-sufficiency through building necessary skills and knowledge. This similar wisdom is also seen in several cultures. “Give a man a fish, and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and you feed him for a lifetime” (Ellis, 1996: p. 215).
2.2.1. Empowerment
Valuing the knowledge and skills refugees bring can foster their sense of empowerment. Rather than focusing on the deficits only, it is essential to employ strength-based approaches and culturally responsive practices to work with refugee populations. While building their cultural competency of the host culture, utilizing their strengths and connecting with their cultural roots will be effective to foster their learning of the new cultural knowledge and skills. It benefits not only the refugee community but also the society as a whole, making use of cultural capital to create productive citizens. For example, with improved access to language training, a former physician could serve as a medical liaison to the refugee community by being an interpreter in the medical facility rather than being a factory worker. Such opportunities can instill in refugees confidence and a sense of ownership over and responsibility to the path to resettlement success.
2.2.2. English Language
Another pathway to reach the refugee community is through English as Second Language (ESL) classes. Language barriers play a significant role in the challenges refugee families face as mentioned previously. Perhaps ESL classes can be used as a window of opportunity to reach refugee families and provide other services and information. Garrett (2006) indicates that the ESL instructor is one of a few highly trusted individuals that refugees turn to for help. By designing curriculum that infuses topics relevant to American culture, ESL teachers can build the necessary skills and knowledge to address the challenges refugees face in English curriculum, such as building family-school relationship, employment, housing, etc.
2.2.3. Parenting
Regarding refugees’ parenting practices, refugee parents often have limited parenting knowledge of the new host culture. Language acquisition support and cultural knowledge enrichment benefit refugee parents’ parenting practices (Deen, 2018; Tingvold et al., 2012; Tsai et al., 2011). As mentioned before, the host culture’s parenting practices and views can be quite different from how refugee parents were raised. Upon refugees’ first arrival, local private resettlement agencies smoothen the initial 90-day transition by providing a range of services, including food, housing, clothing, employment information, and other necessary services (Refugee Council USA, 2019). Many agencies provide short-term, intensive (e.g., 3 days) cultural orientations that focus on topics relevant to experiences that refugees may encounter as they resettle in their new communities (COR Center, 2019). One of the topics discussed is parenting. Parenting practices are personal and engrained deeply in the culture of one’s own upbringing. As demonstrated by a recent study on refugee parents, learning the parenting norms of a different culture requires long-term learning, reflections, and practices (Huang et al., 2019).
Upon arrival into the United States, refugees immediately attend intensive government-instituted cultural orientation sessions, which include information on United States laws and norms regarding parenting practices. Refugee parents who attended these cultural orientation sessions overwhelmingly reported recall of only a single outstanding element from the larger module on parenting: the prohibition and illegality of spanking. Moreover, this pervasive misconception is inaccurate—while spanking is considered an inappropriate physical punishment, it is physical abuse, not spanking, that is illegal in the United States (Huang et al., 2019). However, there are many aspects of parenting these families encounter on a daily basis, such as parent-child communication, conflict resolutions, relationship, discipline, family-school relations, etc. It requires time to learn, digest, reflect, and expand their repertoire of practices. Thus, it is vital to provide continual support, from first arrival to delivery of services. Hiring qualified advocates to bridge the interaction between refugee families and the mainstream community can result in responding to their parenting needs efficiently. Due to refugee families’ busy schedule, it is difficult to spare time to attend parenting programs. We recommend that utilizing the existing social group in the refugee community can be an alternative network to provide parenting support. Professional advocates can also reach out to the established refugee group to provide access to resources and services, such as churches in the Congolese community (Huang et al., 2019).
2.3. Family-School Relations
With respect to family-school relations and parental involvement, school professionals have limited cultural knowledge concerning refugee communities in general. For example, Huang et al. (2019) indicated that many school practitioners were unaware of the differences between immigrants and refugees. After working with the refugee students for an entire school year, some teachers were not aware of having refugee students in the classroom. The lack of cultural knowledge in the school professional community hinders effective collaboration with refugee families to foster their children’s learning success. Refugee students and families have specific needs to be addressed. We suggest that school administrators provide professional development for school practitioners to enhance their understanding concerning refugee families. Without the knowledge, it is almost impossible to help the students to maximize their learning potential.
Strengthening school practitioners’ knowledge can lead to greater sensitivity toward different cultures and traditions. Furthermore, due to their frequent contact with the students, school professionals can play essential role in support of refugee families and collaborate with refugee professional advocates. There are several areas to help refugee families in adapting to their resettled environment, such as family’s well-being, coping abilities, employment, etc. (Garrett, 2006). It is essential that schools and their teachers are aware of the family needs and take an active role to work closely with parents and professional advocates, providing the support needed to help these children succeed in school.
Concerning family-school communications, schools need to thoughtfully develop effective and creative strategies to reach out to families with low English proficiency. In addition to using traditional communication methods (e.g., newsletter, email), schools should consider employing alternative methods that refugee families are familiar with. For example, in the Congolese community, mobile phone communication is prevalent (Huang et al., 2019). The lack of English proficiency and low literacy level in their own native language is common. Thus, it may be effective to utilize the cell phone as a communication tool to reach out to these families, such as using translation computer software to provide messages in their own language. To reach out to refugee parents with low literacy level in their own native language, perhaps the advocate can video-record the message and send it via cell phone to these parents. As mentioned previously, valuing refugee family culture and using culturally responsive strategies are critical. For example, schools can organize multicultural activities, bringing refugee parents to the school, and promoting diversity in the school settings.
In addition to those highlighted above, several other strategies can be implemented to build positive relationship with refugee parents. Community support can be in the form of gatherings, which could lead to support systems that foster a stronger sense of belonging for parents and their children (Lewig et al., 2010). If parents are interested, schools can offer family education programs or support groups for refugee families to discuss topics of their interests and needs. Offering family support services is essential to build positive and collaborative family-school relations. School can provide tutoring services for refugee students to support their learning. Thus, school needs to take a proactive role, reaching out to refugee parents who may be too intimidated to participate in school activities due to limited English proficiency and lack of schooling experiences themselves.
3. Conclusion
In summary, this paper exposed the challenges refugee families face due to language barriers and limited cultural knowledge of the host country. We focused on refugee parents’ challenges on parenting practices and parental involvement in children’s education. Raising children in an unfamiliar culture without the support system of a home country can be daunting. Experiencing the strife between preserving original heritage and assimilating into the host culture’s child-rearing styles and family values can be stressful. It can alter family relationships, family role shift, and parents’ well-being. Despite the intermittent schooling experiences, refugee parents value education and believe that it is the key to their children’s success and family’s social upward mobility. However, lack of education, busy work schedules, and low English proficiency can negatively impact parental involvement level and children’s academic performance. It is difficult for these parents to communicate with school staff and discuss their concerns and issues regarding their children. In the end, we discussed the implications and suggestions to address the challenges refugee families face in the areas of systemic and personnel support, effective strategies, and family-school relations. Future research in this area can shed light into understanding refugee family’s resettlement experiences such as raising their children in a new host country and provide insights into the refugee literature.